How long has it been since you pulled a hand-addressed envelope out of your mailbox? I’m assuming it’s been forever, if you’re anything like me — the little lock box outside my apartment has been mostly coupons I’ll never use and (of course) an avalanche of election-related flyers.
My correspondence with friends relies instead on little red notification dots and scheduling snafus that have us waiting weeks or months before we can connect on a phone call. I no longer get the pleasure of reading their words, in their handwriting, like I once did when we passed notes in high school hallways. Or even internationally — there were a few fleeting days when I had a pen pal in Spain who wrote me each line in both English and Spanish as we practiced learning each other’s languages. It’s been far too long, and I miss it.
And now that we’re heading into the holidays, I can never forget the hand-written family update notes my mom would lovingly write and photocopy onto Santa stationery to send to our long distance relatives. So cheesy, and so iconic.🧑🎄
“I no longer get the pleasure of reading my friends’ words, in their handwriting, like I once did when we passed notes in high school hallways.”
All of these memories come flooding back as we’ve seen the USPS fighting for financial sustainability in recent years, receiving both public support and government assistance to preserve an important (and equally favored across the political spectrum) public institution. With more than a 30 percent drop in first-class mail volume in the past 10 years according to the USPS, and not to mention the reduction in print publications, the USPS is still at risk of privatization and disruption. So if you’ve snagged a stamp book in recent years (and if you have one tucked away in a drawer somewhere), perhaps it’s time to resurrect the handwritten letter and write some love notes. Here’s how!
How To Write A Letter
Let’s start with the basics — well, let’s let USPS cover the basic basics, like how to address an envelope. They’re the experts. If you’re sending a short to mid-length letter in a standard envelope, your best bet is to purchase Forever Stamps. They’ll cost a flat rate now but will cover the fluctuating price of standard postage in the future. Otherwise, as of writing, the cost of a standard First-Class Mail stamp is $0.73 and $0.56 for a postcard. If you have penpals in other countries, head here for international postage prices.
When it comes to supplies, it’s okay to do it up on fancy stationery — or just keep it simple! Use what you have first, but if you must invest in stationery and writing utensils, look for paper made from recycled or FSC Certified materials. If you somehow don’t have a million promotional pens at home, invest in a refillable pen made from natural or long-lasting materials (like these ones) or a fountain pen. There’s also nothing wrong with tearing out a page from a mostly-used spiral-bound notebook and drafting something up with those sparkly gel pens you still have (I see you).
You can even make an envelope from thick paper you already have on hand. My friend used to send me letters in envelopes made from vibrantly colored pages from her adult coloring book. It brightens my day every time, and I always pin the envelopes on my bulletin board or use them as bookmarks. I haven’t written back in ages, but think about her frequently whenever I come across another envelope tucked in an old journal or book. Which brings me to my next point, who to send your letter to.
Who should you write to?
The possibilities here are only limited by the addresses you can’t find in your contacts or on the internet (don’t be creepy though). Write to friends, family, old coworkers, old flames (🔥😘). Ask your friends and acquaintances on social media to send along their address so you can send them a letter to brighten their day — I feel like we’ve all been a little lonelier these days, so it never hurts to reach out. Just be thoughtful about who you share your address with!
“Ask your friends and acquaintances on social media to send along their address so you can send them a letter to brighten their day — I feel like we’ve all been a little lonelier these days, so it never hurts to reach out.”
My most favorite letters to have ever written were to two of my grandparents before they passed away. I wrote about the silly things, like how I was writing sketch comedy shows with my friends, and I wrote about the big things, like how grateful I was to have learned to fish from grandpa and how to crochet from grandma. I told them I loved them; putting it on paper felt like the best goodbye I knew how to give when I couldn’t be there in person.
If you don’t know who else to write to at this very moment, you can send letters of accountability to your representatives. The American Psychological Association has a handy guide on how to write a persuasive letter, along with tools for finding who you should address them to and what to expect. Other ways to send letters include writing to seniors through Project Pen Pal or Love For Our Elders, finding a penpal in this moderated group on Facebook, or writing to people who are currently incarcerated through this Better Business Bureau-accredited organization.
What should you write about?
I felt love when I wrote those letters to my grandparents, and I know they felt love when reading them. What do you want to say from your heart to your recipient’s heart? That is what you should write.
A good letter is one that thoroughly considers its recipient while honoring the voice of the sender. If you know your reader will love a rundown of your daily routine, by all means, share it. If you know that they distinctly would not like that, then choose a different direction.
“Letters are a place for writers to get their message across uninterrupted. It’s all about you telling your story in a way that invites the other person to feel seen, recognized, supported, and understood.”
Letters are a place for writers to get their message across uninterrupted. It’s all about you telling your story in a way that invites the other person to feel seen, recognized, supported, and understood. In turn, any note you receive should be treated the same. By writing a letter, we’re putting trust in the hands of someone else to hear us—spilling the ink of vulnerability, so to speak.
A “just because” letter can be special and come at a time when someone needs it most. But maybe you need some extra prompting—here are some other occasions to send a letter:
- To share a memory or tell a story
- To make an apology
- To extend forgiveness
- To express gratitude
- To say “I love you”
- To console grief
- To set boundaries in a relationship
And if you receive that ever-coveted response, it’s okay to take your time in responding. Maybe you need to mull over some of the points from your correspondence, or maybe your schedule doesn’t allow for a response right now — the point of writing letters is to celebrate the slowness and make space for the process.
Finally, writing a letter can look different for everyone! You can work with a trusted friend to take down a dictation, send photos of your daily life instead of writing, or type out a note on a typewriter. However you send your next love note, make it count by writing in a way that only you can: from your heart.
As for me? I’m off to that little blue postal box on the corner, with my next letter in hand. 💕 ✉️ Who will your next letter be to? Share in the comments below!
Emily McGowan is the Editorial Director at The Good Trade. She studied Creative Writing and Business at Indiana University, and has over ten years of experience as a writer and editor in sustainability and lifestyle spaces. Since 2017, she’s been discovering and reviewing the top sustainable home, fashion, beauty, and wellness products so readers can make their most informed decisions. Her editorial work has been recognized by major publications like The New York Times and BBC Worklife. You can usually find her in her colorful Los Angeles apartment journaling, caring for her rabbits and cat, or gaming. Say hi on Instagram!