As we head into the fall and winter holidays, spending time with loved ones rises to the top of our list of priorities. The holiday season often brings together many generations under a single roof, no matter if it is for a traditional family gathering or popping over for a celebration in your building with some eclectic neighborhood personalities.
“This year, we were curious to hear what traditions you return to and cherish as time goes on.”
This year, we were curious to hear what traditions you return to and cherish as time goes on. The traditions you shared with us were mainly holiday celebrations, but they also included other heartwarming ways that you stay connected to your history.
We loved hearing about all the recipes, games, and other rituals that you look forward to each year — and how you continue to carry your connection to previous generations into the future. Browse through the generational traditions below and share yours in the comments, too!
*Some responses have been condensed or edited for clarity.
Family quirks, customs, and habits
“My dad always put a dollop of butter on our nose when it was our birthday. He said his dad used to do it, and generations before him. Very random, but always sure to make us laugh!” – KC
“On birthdays we make sure the person has their presents in bed in the morning to make them feel special as soon as they wake up. It took me seeing other people on their birthdays to realize not everyone does this. It always makes me sad when people don’t have presents on their bed in the morning. My mum even makes sure boyfriends, girlfriends and best friends have a bag of gifts to open in the morning and it reminds me of how unbelievably kind and sweet she is that she wants people to feel special and loved.” – Talicza
“Some of my favorites below are started by my mom and/or me: 1. Add “Happy birthday” or “Happy new year” or other celebratory words to a photos of flowers/plants and send to the intended. 2. Have a small trash can in each room corner for convenience — others think I have way too many trash cans but it works for me. 3. Cook a quick meal using only the rice cooker. In college, I even had two rice cookers, one to make rice, and the other to cook food and soup. No smoke ever, cannot catch on fire, dorm friendly, novice-friendly, and has a lid ready at all times.” – Elena P
“The women in my family use the middle name Elizabeth. My daughter Althea is the 6th generation.” – Kath A
“Just making up your own words or phrases in family can make you feel so close & special.” – Jenna C
“Family rings. My great-grandmother’s rings were deconstructed and made into matching rings for my grandmother, aunt, 4 of us great-grandchildren, and a couple more for future generations. I wear mine every day to feel close to those generations and it brings me so much peace.” – KDE
“The love for soccer has been passed down to me by my dad. He played soccer, and so did my brothers and me. My nephews and nieces also love soccer. And now their kids love the sport. If I have children I’m gonna show them why this sport is so important to us. It has brought the family together every Sunday to enjoy a game of soccer. I hope to pass this love down to the next generation.” – TH
“Our family has always gathered for family meals in a really meaningful way. It has looked different in different seasons of life, but one of my favorite seasons was when my late grandmother would host us all around her large dining room table for Monday Night Supper. Now that I have children of my own, I hope to reinstate this tradition in the near future. One way we practice this intentional gathering is by simply lighting the candles each time we eat together, no matter the time of day. My husband initiated this, and now it is normal for us to have candle-lit meals every day. Home-cooked dinner? Light the candles. Leisurely weekend lunch? Candles. Quick breakfast before we all head off to our respective routines? Cereal by candlelight. It is my favorite thing.” – Kate
Food & drink
“Making applesauce cakes in the fall. My great-grandmother made them with my mom and her siblings every year. My mom made them with me and my siblings. And now I’m looking forward to making them with my little girl for the first time this year!” – Megan F
“I use my grandmother’s meatball and meatloaf recipe monthly.” – JD
“Yes! Every Halloween my mom and I would make candied apples for Halloween to pass out to my friends as they came by! As an adult, I’ll make them or we make them together and I share with my coworkers!” – ATT
“My family has always made birthday cake pancakes for each other’s birthdays. It’s something I’ve now passed down to my daughters.” – Isabella S
“My grandmother has a delicious meatball recipe and every time we go to visit her we all look forward to her special meatballs no one makes them like she can. She is Italian and she does not use a written recipe. She does it all by memory and by the feel and texture of the mixture. She has been teaching my sister and me to make them as well and it is such a beautiful experience to make them together and know that the only way to pass down the recipe is by hands-on learning and word of mouth. I cannot wait to share it with my future kids and pass on the stories and legacy of their great-grandmother as I do.” – Victoria N
“Every Monday night I have family (and friends that are family) over for spaghetti night. My husband’s grandmother started the tradition. I continued it when my kids were little then had to stop when they hit high school and our schedules were insane. Now that my adult children are around more, I started it again. I make a crockpot full of sauce and several pounds of pasta. My parents bring dessert and we linger all evening, chatting and catching up, and laughing until our sides hurt. It fills my heart with the most amazing sense of belonging and contentment.” – Laurie N
“Sweet Potato Casserole: boil 4 lbs of sweet potatoes until soft; remove skins. In large bowl, mix sweet potatoes with 1 1/2 tbs cinamon, 2 tsp ginger; 1 1/2 tsp pepper; 1 tsp each: nutmeg, cardamon. Mix well. Top with marshmallows according to my Grandma…but optional.” – MDT
“Tomato canning. My parents were Italian immigrants. They came through Ellis Island in 1954 and truly lived the American dream. They brought many of their regional traditions with them and held them dear through their 50+ years of marriage. I’ve held on to several with the most special to me is the end-of-summer tomato canning. It’s a 4-day event that now includes several good friends, one of my nephews, and anyone who’d like to help…it’s so much work and payment is in jars of sauce when we’re done! This year we canned 116 jars. Buon appetite! 🍅” – Linda M
Holiday traditions & celebrations
“Día de los muertos! And building an ofrenda (an altar) to remember passed loved ones. It’s a beautiful way to remember them. We decorate the altar with candles, their favorite foods and drink, and we make a really hearty meal as a family and talk about said loved ones. It’s one of my favorite family traditions.” – HF
“Celebration of divali.” – Sarania D
“My mom would gift my grandparents a calendar that she made from pictures of the family throughout the entire year for Christmas every year. My grandparents have since passed away, and last year was the first year I carried on the tradition and gifted my mom a family calendar for Christmas.” – Morgan B
“Every year since I was a little girl, my grandma and I will make a Christmas mouse together. They are little felt ornaments that are just so cute. Now my grandma is 93 and her little fingers can’t sew anymore, but she hands me each piece and makes sure I do each step right! Both my parents and mine & my husband’s trees are filled with Christmas mice!” – Jillian O
“My family is German, and we always celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve. It’s a German thing to have the main events on Christmas Eve, so the family gathers and eats that day” – Anonymous Reader
“YES! At Christmas time, we always cut down our own Christmas tree. No matter where we live, we find a farm. We bring hot cocoa and pick the perfect tree. We always purchase a new tree ornament at the tree farm, or sometime during our travels within the year. On the way home from the tree farm, we either stop for burgers and shakes or have pizza delivered while we decorate the tree. The oven is also always pre-heated to bake homemade ginger molasses cookies to watch with our first Christmas movie of the year, by the white twinkling lights of the tree, and roar of a fire in the fireplace. This has been a tradition our mother did with us growing up — and almost 48 years later, my daughter and I still do this every year. She is almost 18. One of the fondest times in my childhood, and memories created with my daughter.” – Kimberlea M
“Day of the death. Around this celebration, we put up altars for our deceased loved ones and we decorate them with many colors, their pictures, and the food they liked the most. Sometimes we add things that belonged to them. There’s usually an assortment of sugar and chocolate skulls with their names as well.” – MD
“Nuts, oranges, new toothbrush for Christmas.” – EB
“My family is not a board game family, but we do play Trivial Pursuit every Christmas – because my parents first met over a game of Trivial Pursuit with friends!” – Mareike
“Finding and cutting down a Christmas tree from local NC mountain farms.” – Anonymous Reader
“My husband’s family always had their Christmas gathering on Christmas Eve. We married, his children and our children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren have continued this tradition.” – Elizabeth G
“Thanksgiving is approaching…Most toast to gratitude for food, health & friends. In the Patt homestead, we share more than broad sentiments. We share specifics! 😉 For example, ‘Mom, I really appreciated when I got home late from the airport, my bedroom shades were pulled down, and you had made up my bed with clean linens.’ After all, life is a series of thousands of tiny miracles we need to tune into and be grateful for.” – Sarah P
Holiday meals
“My mother created and passed down a wonderful tradition for the Wednesday before Thanksgiving: We always have taco salad the night before while preparing for the big meal the next day. We do it potluck style now so no one has to worry about dinner the day before.” – Sam L
“Thanksgiving through Christmas, my grandmother’s recipe box gets a workout. My great-grandmother’s pecan pie must be served at Thanksgiving. You wouldn’t dream of December without my grandmother’s ginger molasses cookies. And on Christmas Eve, we gather for a dinner of chicken and rice soup and chicken salad sandwiches. I asked my mom why that was The Meal, and she couldn’t tell me; it had already been an established tradition when she was born. Now my daughter is five and already knows what we will eat after Christmas Eve church services.” – Camille W
“We have a family Christmas cake recipe that is passed down. Each year, the family gathers to make the cake and we all take turns stirring the mixture, making a wish, and stirring in an intention. Then we all fight to lick the bowl!” – Anonymous Reader
“Our traditional Christmas Eve meal is fondue. It adds to the beauty and mystery of the day. We linger over dinner and talk as we wait for Christmas and the promise that brings. My siblings and now our children are carrying on this tradition.” – Janet H
“Annual Cookie Bake.” – Erica F
“My family has such few traditions, but the ones we do have center on the progression of Christmas meals. It feels like a well-worn path, a book you’ve read a thousand times, or the comfort show you marathon every now and again. Christmas Eve dinner is cheese fondue and a special white wine (during which my dad inevitably says, “It’s fun to fondue”), followed by “The Santa Clause.” Christmas morning is coffee and presents followed by eggs benedict and Bloody Marys and “Love Actually,” followed by all-day lounging in PJs. It is always the same no matter where we’ve lived or been at Christmas.” – MLH
“We make fudge every Christmas, following the very specific instructions left to us by our maternal grandmother. When we were little, we left out fudge for Santa (along with a glass of milk) instead of cookies, and once we were old enough to appreciate the story our mom told us about how her mother perfected the recipe, down to the 1 minute and 32-second mark for stirring the fudge before taking it off the heat. I know my mom keeps a hidden stash in the freezer for when days get particularly rough, and I suspect my younger sibling does the same!” – Mara S
“On Christmas Eve, we make homemade potato soup with scallions and bacon as garnish. The recipe is my great-great-great grandmother’s recipe. When we leave the house to go to college or an “adult job,” the recipe gets passed down to the children. I make it to this day for my children. It is only eaten once per year, which makes it extra special.” – AM
“We have cooked the same recipes on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day for more than thirty years. It started with my husband’s family and has now continued with us since our beloved mom died. I’m so grateful for the comfort and joy we can still create and the shared history we all cherish.” – Chrissy J
“My mom, grandma, great-grandma, and possibly my great-great grandma made a Christmas cake that is so dense and filled with rum and brandy, that not only did you risk chipping a tooth, you risked getting somewhat tispy. It has been passed down to me. (Even though I have 40 cousins.) And if I don’t make it this year, I may be kicked out of the family. JK!!” – Angela C
Ashley D’Arcy is Senior Editor at The Good Trade. She holds an MA in philosophy from The New School for Social Research and a BA in English & American literature from New York University. Her writing has been featured by The Nation, 032c, and sold by Printed Matter. In 2017, she was featured on Apple’s first original series “Planet of the Apps” where she was mentored by Gwyneth Paltrow. She is currently a psychoanalyst-in-training at Pulsion Institute in New York City.
